Today the fashion industry is scrambling to recover from a viral post that has done the unthinkable.  For years many outlets have tried to inform the industry’s largest consumers –women- that the beauty standards depicted in marketing campaigns are wildly unrealistic.  For years that message for the most part remained largely ignored, presumably because people didn’t understand the implications…that is, until today.

In an off the cuff post, Ida Schitunot of Dongiv, AF, captured the hearts and minds of women everywhere when she wrote “These models are considered the most beautiful women in the world and they STILL get photoshopped?  Well what the fuck, I’ll never be able to compete with that.  Give me some fucking ice cream and a floor length bathrobe because I give up.”

Like wildfire her post spread across social media with women everywhere realizing the current standard of beauty is so high it’s pointless to compete.  Her words were greeted with enthusiasm and echoed with responses of “Goddamit you’re right, why am I starving myself for this shit?” “My new goal BMI is fuck it!” And “Ida’s right, I’m going to eat my McDonalds at the table instead of the closet because I’m never going to look like make believe women!”

Ben and Jerry’s stock tripled overnight and the hashtag #BodyLikeIda can be seen just about everywhere, including a new line from Victoria’s Secret. The  extra boxy cotton tee shirts and relaxed fit terry boyfriend pants are marketed towards the every day woman who realizes it’s past time to stop wearing clothes designed for mannequins.

Although casual wear vendors everywhere are overjoyed with the new trend, high end beauty lines are scrambling to take back their audience.  One designer interviewed went on record stating “we just pushed them too far and now we are paying for it,  using design programs to erase all traces of humanity from six foot tall 97lb women with small breasts  appears to be the wrong formula in an age where the average American woman is 5’5 and a size 14.  We can’t sell them the dream because they finally realized it was always our untenable fantasy encouraging them to wear underwear that is literally a counterproductive string belt.”

Nobody knows what the long term consequences of this fashion liberation will be but industry analysts are speculating high heel sales will hit a record low this season: “It’s clear that woman now realize these painful unhealthy fashions we’ve been pedaling could never compare to the power of photoshop, professional stylists and studio lighting so it’s doubtful women will continue to spend gobs of money on ridiculous footwear that destroys their orthopedic bone structure to pretend they look five pounds lighter as they walk like their legs don’t bend.”

Let’s just hope the economy can handle two genders dressing sensibly and economically.  At least we still have children’s character wear and brand loyalty.


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